Hillary Clinton Wins Rhode Island
Looks great in Red Pant Suit. Says we are “More than ready” to give our Veterans genuinely compassionate care at about 11:20 Eastern Time in Ohio.
Hillary Clinton Wins Ohio
Looks even better in Red Pant Suit.
Says we have to fight to make our hopes and dreams realities through “hard work and leadership” and that her outfit has never been short on either. Glamwire begins an intense operation to get a hold of her Red Pant Suit and run tests on it to see if statement holds up. Croud Chants, “yes she will.” She will do a lot of things, and it is hard to know what they mean. It is 11.30 EST. At 11;31 The Glamwire News Teams sets out on frantic search to find out who designed the pant suit. Zac Time ventures, “Looks pretty Dior to me.” Barbara Rizpah Lowe counters, “Yeah, maybe if this was 1947.” An anonymous tip comes in saying they may be from someone named “Jessica Howard.” Our research team cannot confirm this by 3 AM EST.
Barack Obama Wins Vermont
Looks great in San Antonio in Blue Suit, White Shirt and Red Tie all by Men’s Warehouse (this is according to annonymous email tip from someone called “Dress Shirt…size 17.5.” This has not been confirmed. Obama speaks of the amazing reality of his backround and how far he’s come, and notes that the world is watching what we do, and how we conduct ourselves, and particulalry how we dress* at 11;40 EST.
This is all as dictated by Dress Shirt…size 17.5…..not yet confirmed by TGNT.
Hillary Clinton Wins Popular Vote In Texas.
Sleeps in Red Pant Suit, completey discombulating our reporter Sandy Fine’s chances of pretenting to a housekeeper at the Columbus Sheridan and stealing the Pant Suit. Another Annonynous source, this time claiming to be “Medium Sports Pants” speaks of a mysterious”Chinese Asbestos Pant Suit” in Hillary’s past, and we are off the to the races, on the road the Pennsylvania.
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